Story Archive - October 2006

Halloween (10/31/2006)

My left name is tremendous savings, Ms. America! - Senor Cardgage

It's Halloween season. I love this season. At work we had a pumpkin carving event. Halloween is one of the holidays that can typically be celebrated at the workplace without HR complaining about religious context. We were able to get the pumpkin carving event without an issue, but were told that we aren't allowed to promote a dress for Halloween event. Whatever.

My group at work is well known as having a frat boy mentality. Along with the bottle of Fernet I had just finished I put together a version of the drunk pumpkin, winning first prize. I told one of my friends from my birthday party it was modeled on him, and all he could say was: "All of my rinds and seeds stayed in my stomach."

Friday night I headed out to another friend's home who does, more or less, and annual pumpkin carving event. I worked my heart out to carve three babies. The first one was dubbed Calvin, since it somehow looks a little like the mischievous boy, the second was a kitty that I forgot to photograph and the third was TROGDOR! My and Strong Bad are tight. If you don't believe me, check out email number 92. Trust me.

Getting Things Done (10/25/2006)

The compulsion to be perfect, immediately and eternally, is one of the most profound causes of procrastination for the garden-variety human, and it most certainly gives each of us all the reason we'll ever need not to even try. - Merlin Mann

I've been reading a lot of "getting things done" literature recently. I'm even tempted to buy the official book. I haven't yet, because after the vast majority of my online research, I've decided that I'm not going to learn any more.

The main issue I've been having is letting all my getting-it-done motivation be used up while I'm at the office, so that all I want to do in my evening time is lounge on the cough, curled up with kitten, watching old episodes of Babylon 5. Now that can be a good use of time. Honestly, if I were to convert all my evening time into task-oriented time, my head would implode. I have this old system I used a couple years ago that I'm trying to bring back into my life. Each evening, complete one personal task. Monday night I went through two months of mail and filed it. Tuesday I took at the trash. Wednesday night I did a load of laundry. Done. That's all it takes. It's manageable and I get stuff done.

How Did You Get Into Computers (10/24/2006)

It's never too late to have a happy childhood. - Rudy Rucker

How did you get interested in computers? During one of my many visits to the Googleplex I saw that question written up on the wall. "How did you get interested in computers'" As I looked through all the answers I found the common theme was either computer games or BBS.

My first computer was an Apple IIe and I used it play games. The first games I remember loving were Lode Runner, Wings of Fury, Robotech and Demon's Winter. Load Runner had a level designing application and I would spend hours building levels. I tried to design one level in the morning before school while my brother using our shared bathroom to shower and get ready. When I discovered BASIC I started coding. I wrote a giant choose-your-own-adventure game in basic. Very simple stuff. "Do you go this way or that" followed by a GOTO statement. I came to an amazing revelation one day thinking, "if they buy a sword I could store that in a sword variable." Then, inventory was born. Slowly it grew into a real command-line role playing system. I was geek. This was all 2nd-4th grade.

My father bought us a 300 baud modem which we would use to call our friends with an Apple IIe and type to each other. Then I discovered California Computer Network (CCN) at grocery store which had a giant list containing tens of BBSes in the area I could call. I started downloading games. I got a virus on my Apple IIe from a copy of Spy vs. Spy.

I guess my answer is both games and BBSes and also programming. I also think there was a huge amount of, "I'm better at this than my parents" arrogance that made it in there too. I think it's almost sad these days that the IDE or interpreter isn't a key part of modern operating systems.

What do the kids with the programming itch do these days? They update their MySpace template with crap. It's sad.

Mmm... Smooth... (10/21/2006)

The proper union of gin and vermouth is a great and sudden glory; it is one of the happiest marriages on earth, and one of the shortest lived. - Bernard De Voto

I went out to downtown San Jose on Friday with my girl and her family. After a very nice dinner we hit a couple bars. I had to drive home, so I started the night with my only single drink. I ordered a rum and Coke (Cuba Libre to some of you), but the bartender had a hard time hearing me over the insanely loud Motley Crew cover band (and that is an over-saturated market of one) and he poured me the wrong drink I didn't notice until I sat down and took sip and gagged. Smooth. How does a bartender possibly think someone purposely ordered a gin and Coke? I'm fairly confident no one does that. When you consider that gin's signature drink, the martini, is now more often made as vodka martini, you have to imagine it isn't the best-loved liquor.

That night one of the crazy drunk cousins was trying to pressure me into to drinking more, and I didn't. Drivers do not. The last time I went up for a drunk tank in the city I was the designated driver. Our veteran bar hopper, in his insanely drunken stupor, was trying to get everyone (but me) in the group to drink to the point of puking using insults to manhood and threats of physical violence. One of the other kids tried to pressure me into a drink and our veteran's face changed. A veil of sobriety and seriousness descended instantaneously on him and he looked at the group, "One rule if you're going to role with me. You never pressure a driver into drinking. Everyone understand'" There was a pause as everyone nodded in agreement. The veil lifted, "Good! Because if the rest of you don't do another shot of Fernet I am going to punch you in the face! You drink like twenty-five year old married women."

I Want Tasty Gold (10/06/2006)

We human beings are capable of convincing ourselves of something that's not true long after the accumulated evidence would convince any reasonable person that it's wrong. - Algore

I don't think it's a secret that I'm an environmentalist. I don't think it's a secret that we live in a capitalist nation. That mashup leads me to use money to express my ethics. I pay more for my renewable power. I pay more for environmentally sensitive cleaning products.

I'm a proud Prius driver. I'm a very proud Prius driver. I am constantly frustrated by people who like to point out that hybrids do not equate to cost savings. For the record, you are right! It shouldn't be a surprise to any educated person. What percentage of car drivers look up the total cost of ownership of vehicles, and then pick the one at the very bottom' Since these nay-sayers are not driving a Geo Metro or Toyota Yarris the overall cost of ownership is not the primary decision factor they have used either. People with this logic are just looking to for convenient lie that pacify their conscience when they buy the car they actually want (which will often have a higher TCO than a hybrid anyway).

Think about how the argument would equate to other areas. "Well, we looked at paying our employees, but it turns out that just using slave labor is far more profitable." "Well, we'd like for runoff from our farms not to kill off huge fish populations in the Gulf of Mexico, but turns out that it's way cheaper just to keep using deadly pesticides as long as the runoff goes into international waters."

Anyway, the basic premise is this: if you have disposable income you can spend to make the world a better place, that is a better use of your money than that new Microsoft Zune player you REALLY want. You probably already own an iPod anyway, right'